Posts Tagged ‘happy’

Happy Father’s Day to all the fathers out there. Here in Pakistan and everywhere in the world anyway today is fathers day. I am not sure how far and wide around the world this celebration extends. I think Mothers Day and Fathers Day should be celebrated everywhere. Any that read this maybe you could tell me if it is celebrated where you live.

I can hear a lot of “oh no’s” echoing from everywhere when I say I have been thinking again. Thinking that is about Fathers day and what it means or could mean.

Now first off, who can be a father? Well biologically the way our bodies are, virtually any male over, I don’t know about the ages of 12 or 13 can father a child. That is just the way it is. Now there is though a world of difference between fathering a child and being a father. I imagine everyone would know what I mean here and no further explanation is needed.

Now I know today will be a day of family gatherings, BBQ’s etc and that the phone lines will be busy to capacity as dads are acknowledged and to that I say right on.

I am issuing two challenges today. First to the fathers. Your children will be gathering around you or calling you to both pay their respects and honor you on this day. I challenge all fathers to take a few moments to reflect on this past year. The year that has gone by since last father’s day. Reflect on the type of father you have been to your children in this past year. Do you really deserve to be honored in this way on this day? What kind of a father have you been in this past year?

We should never look for perfection when we think of our parenting roles, impossible to attain. As you look back you may see situations that were “disastrous” but even that is OK and acceptable if we were truly trying our best. Trying our best is all that can ever be asked of anyone in any situation. Just think about it, did you try your best or deep within do you know you took the easy way out, which often seems to be simply ignoring the kids. Think about this, keep it in mind and accept whatever honors or tributes are passed your way on this, your day. Just keep it in mind, think about it, there will be another father’s day next year. Do you need to and will you be making any changes in this next year?

Another thought to the fathers. Children in our lives are a blessing from God. Could Fathers Day possibly be a day in which we also honor our children the very ones that qualify us as fathers? Without our children this day would be meaningless to us, think about it.

If there are any dead beat dads that read this. I suggest this one thing. Go and pick up a baseball bat,use it to sharply strike yourself on the side of the head.

To the children of all ages celebrating father’s day. Why are you doing it? Have your really given any thought to this day or is it just another day on the calendar. A day in which we feel obligated to give him a call or maybe get the family together. Just because that is what is expected by society to be done. Will you say “Happy Fathers Day” just to get the words out and over with for another year? Mothers Day and Fathers day can have real meaning and significance or they can just be days in which we have a family obligation. Which is it for you?

I would be interested on hearing from all on this.

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One of my recent posts has come back to haunt me. Thoughts that just occasionally rattle around in this empty head of mine.

One of the questions was to the effect, if you somehow knew you only had 5 minutes to live and could leave behind but one recorded message, what would it be, and to whom would you leave it? I was looking for thoughts or ideas from readers. Now I find I have received 3 different emails asking me how in fact I would answer that very question. Now that is actually something I have given thought to over the past couple of years. I”d know what I would want my message to be, it is just how to find the words to express it. I have actually tried to write it out a couple of times but find myself getting lost and going in circles. I am not a writer and have never tried to pretend I am. I am a rambler, I just start typing and what comes out is what it is, so here goes.

First to my family I want to express my undying love. Tell each individually how proud I am of them, how proud, blessed and lucky I am to have them in my family, in my life. i would want to thank all of my friends for honoring me by spending some of their precious time on this earth with me. To any that may chose to read this, may God bless you.

Live Life, be happy. Seek to enjoy every moment of our precious time on this earth. The ability to live life, enjoy life and be happy is right there in front of each of us. We just have to recognize it, reach out and grab it. Every day, every moment we are faced with a decision. As our lives unfold before us, circumstance, situations will develop around us, many of which we have no control over. Life just happens and we are there for the ride. Life or at least any individual part of it may not be the ride we had hoped for but it is what we have at that moment. There are no constants in life, this to shall change. If you are in a bad patch, live the best way you can, knowing this too shall change. If you are in a high spot live it to the max. Remembering this too shall change, this is life something will come along to give your ride even a little bump.

There are always 2 ways to look at everything. We make the choice to look at events with a positive mindset or a negative mindset. As hard as it may seem at times that choice is indeed ours to make. As we make that choice we affect no one but ourselves, the quality of the life we live, the enjoyment we get out of it.

Don’t take things in life personally. If someone say lashes out at you in an unkind, rude or nasty manner. Try to remember, their action is prompted by where they are in their heads at the time, the type of mindset they are carrying. Just because they in their mind are in a bad place doesn’t mean we have to allow them to drag us in our thinking to a similar place. We are only responsible for our own lives, our own thoughts and actions. As we are responsible for our own lives, it is up to us to ensure we care for ourselves by not allowing others to drag us down.

There is another conscious choice we make regularly. Is it better to be “right” or is it better to be happy. I chose happy. Every single person we meet in our journey through life is travelling their own path, which may not be the same as that I have chosen for myself. With this thoughts and feelings on virtually every topic you can imagine may vary. This applies to family, friends, everyone you are going to meet. As I have followed my path, based on my own experiences, my thought on any individual issue may well differ from yours. There is always more than one path anywhere, always more than one way to do most things in life. What could make me think my way is the only right way? Suppose I was in a conflict with anyone, a friend, colleagues, coworkers. Suppose in this conflict, I “KNOW” I am right. At the very same time based on their lives, they also “know” they are right. I am faced with a choice, 2 ways to look at everything. Do I want to push on to “make” everyone else see that I am indeed right or do I want to be happy. I choose happy. In my own mind I am comfortable knowing for me and my thoughts I am indeed right and as I do want happiness more than being recognized as being right I just let it go. Don’t take things personally, be happy!

I likely have more but 5 minutes might be up, don’t know and I am tired.

I’ve been in a funny place these last couple of months. This new life of mine is very much my own, and I’m happy with it. There has been, among all the other more negative, sadder feelings, a deep sense of gratitude for whatever it is that’s allowed me to believe and feel and know that although my life did not pan out as I wanted it to, it is still a good one, and many wonderful things lie ahead for me.

Time and distance have done a lot in offering me a great deal of perspective: with my studies and – what it was and why it was that way, and my role in all of it – and on myself – who I’ve become and what I want out of myself and my life. And this is good; I’ve needed it.

But even as I feel more settled here, there are still things that feel like transitions, moments where I feel in-between two lives, and my mind sometimes pauses and catches that moment, a recognition that my old life is further and further from me and the resulting feeling is, most times, bittersweet.

I see now things I couldn’t see before and so many emotions that I carried with me for so long seem distant. Even the ending, the time when the life I knew imploded and those awful, awful months followed – the intensity is gone. There are quick flashes where I’m suddenly aware – wow, that’s not my life anymore; wow, what a crazy-ass year I’ve had; wow, 10 years down the drain and I’m in my TEE-age now – but they last nanoseconds, slipping from me before I can even touch them.

I think about the choices I have, when life changes so abruptly. When you get past that initial shock, that feeling of being punched square in the gut – you have choices. Do you hold on and insist that those moments were the one, and there will be never be another? Do you stay put; holding on to the memories, building a new life around a past that time has anyway altered? Do you allow the rage to take over and drive you to hurt people – intensely – till your own pain is satisfied? Do you push it all away and refuse to deal with any of it? Do you allow yourself to believe that after the darkness there will indeed be light, and it will be beautiful?

When the dust finally settled for me, there was one startling feeling, one thing that I still sometimes feel a jolt over if it crosses my mind: the life I’d chosen was not the life meant for me. It was not the thing that was right for me. That’s it right there: it was not right for me. And that was such a difficult thing to fully accept, to believe, because it was something I’d chosen and tried so hard to make it work, make it good. But considering that the business has ended, what else is there to believe? Clearly, I was wrong about the depth and strength I’d prescribed to that fantastic start that lead me to a dumb hole. And resisting against such a stark reality didn’t make much sense.

It was a hard thing to wrap my mind around, that I was wrong, and what I expected to be, to just be and stay, was not the thing, after all, that would last or sustain me. Or the place where I would stay. And I don’t mean this like in that immediate way – relationship’s gone bust, it’s over, gotta start over. I mean it in a much deeper way, touching on the things that brought me and my friends together and that made us stay together, and in a way that extends beyond those first months after the ending, the first year, and settles into you. It wasn’t just that we couldn’t make it work; it wasn’t just that shit happened and we ended. It was that – if it ended, and there was no reconciliation, and there was light and hope after all the pain and sadness – then that was just not for me. It wasn’t my destiny; it wasn’t the thing that would never let me go; it wasn’t the end of hope and beauty.
So whatever comes from here – it will be mine to fully embrace. I can walk into it openly and freely. I can let my pain and sadness have their space because they are now as much a part of me as anything else. And I can accept this new life, let its wonders move me – and I can dive right in. The group of friends usually revise down to a very few honest ones, and this is life. People usually are too mean to continue relations with or they usually fuck you hard at times.