Posts Tagged ‘psychology’

Today is 2nd August,  the second day of the month when our country got its independence and we are harassed by the situation through which our country is going through. Floods, target killing and now one of our MPA’s was shot dead. The citizens haven’t been able to get over the tragedy of the plane crash in which every person had a 6 degree relation with some or other one. I knew at least 4 people who died, one was a person with whom I discussed business, a person belonging to the same school and one of my school mates husband and the his brother. We still don’t know what the reality was of the plane crash. Does any of our politician have an answer to it. How can an experienced pilot do such foolish thing?  What was wrong in the plane? Some says a missile fire, some says it was hijacked, some says it was because of the jammers, some says it was because the run way was busy the pilot was asked to take another round and come back after 5 minutes. Can we please get an answer to our queries till when in the government going to hide the realities from us we need the answers.

Then we have the natural flood which has completely taken over with more than 1500 people dead. Where are all our volunteers, why isn’t the government sending them the required aid. And in these situations how can our bloody President go out and have fun in England in an expensive suite, how can he even sleep when his people are dying of hunger and poverty.

Now here we have another MPA dying because of traget killing while he is doing his Wuddu in the Masjid and then we call ourselves Muslim??? Is this what Islam teaches us to kill people in Masjid isn’t Islam suppose to be the name of tolerance?

what is happening to my country when will we be able to come out of all these problems. Till when we as a nation will stay quite. Please have mercy on yourselves and stand up and raise your voices before its too late before we end up in a situation where we are not able to do anything. Stand up not for others but for your nation and for your selves for your better future.

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Had a really excellent day yesterday, enjoying wonderful company. It all really re-enforced the knowing that love is really what is most important in this world. This world of ours truly is a most wondrous place. We just need to take the time to stop look around and enjoy it.

A dear friend yesterday also suggested I check out a site,wonderofitall

Now I didn’t actually time it but it is only maybe a minute long, but what a powerful message contained within that minute. I have been back and watch it 5 or 6 times and each time I do I seem to get more out of it. The title pretty much says it all, the wonder of it all. This struck me as such that I could do many many posts on what it contains and over time I’m sure I will. I certainly encourage all to read it, but I mean read it and think about what you are reading and not just skim through, it will be well worth your time.

At one point it asks a question, wording to the effect, have you ever stood on the shore of an ocean and just looked out. The vastness of the ocean can leave you in awe, as it on the horizon it seems to stretch right to the sky. The sheer vastness, the magnitude of what you are seeing can leave you in awe. Now this refers to the ocean but it would equally apply to a mountain, forest or really anything in nature. We are in awe at the sheer size and beauty of what we see.
We are in even greater awe when we realize that everything we see as huge as it is, is only one small part of all that there is within this wonderful world of ours. No matter how far we can see, it is still only one small part, one really minuscule little part of the wonders, of the beauty of this world.

The more I thought about it, the more clearly I could actually see how this applies to our lives. We can look to our future as we see it may be, we can look to our past, we can look to our sides and see all the events that are currently happening around us. No matter where we look or how hard we look, all we will see is one tiny, minuscule bit of the overall picture of our lives.

The world is filled with beauty and wonders that stretch far beyond our eyes, what we can see at any given moment represents just one very small part of the big picture, the true beauty stretches far beyond what we can see. Also with our lives, truly what we can see at any one given moment only represents just one very small part of the overall big picture.

Beauty and wonders in life surround us, sadly it may often be just beyond our sight range, or at least so it seems when we are in the midst of a crisis. Another wonder is that life is a journey; we do not remain or should not remain stagnant in any one spot. As we travel this journey we can always be comforted by knowing that the true beauty may be just around the next corner on the road.

I need to remember this when faced with the next “crisis” in my life. Great beauty and wonders surround me.
At the moment my range of sight may not be great enough to see over the horizon or past my field of woe. But, I am on a journey. If somehow I could magically look at the road map of my life. I would the more clearly be able to see any “crisis” really only represents on small bump in the road. Or possibly be seen as a construction site on the road. A construction site in which it was I that needed to learn to more successfully avoid, the potholes in the road.

It really does give me a lot to think about.

What benefit comes from feeling Hate? I posed the question to another individual today and his response was that Hate gives you focus. The few times I have experienced an intense hatred for something or someone I recall that focus. Everything faded about me and all that mattered was the object of my hate. The focus was like a razor and the urge to tear down and destroy the focus of my Hate pushed me to action. This was not a benefit. Much like a horse wearing blinders on its bridle I was blinded to any outside facts. I could not see how my actions might affect others or even my own life if I completed them. Shielded from truths and extenuating circumstances, I was able to hold onto my Hate by keeping focus on my own feelings. This self centered dwelling was a selfish action and brought me no real benefit. In the end, the one time I gave into action, I was left with regrets and knowledge of things I wish I had known before hand. Knowledge that I could have easily obtained if I hadn’t allowed Hate to keep my focus so one sided.

Further discussing this we, the individual and I came to the conclusion that Hate allows you to feel self righteous. You cannot hate something or someone and not feel better than your hated target. “Hate” for someone you feel is better or more privileged than you is not actual hate, but instead is envy or jealousy. “Hate” of self is a sensitive subject. I could be swayed into believing such an emotion is possible, however my companion at the time was firm in saying you cannot hate yourself, at least not in the sense that we were speaking of Hate. You can hate your perception of yourself, believing yourself capable of better, which is a form of self righteous behavior. If you feel a “hate” towards yourself but do not believe you can better your inner being or situation, you are in envy of what could have been or should have been, thus bringing us back from hate into jealousy.

Self righteous behavior is belief in being moralistically superior then something or someone else. It gives a false impression of happiness, because it is not sustainable. We all eventually fall off our high horses through mistakes that we make in our lives. This causes us to doubt our supremacy and brings about negative emotions which a self righteous person is required to deflect much like arrows being fired towards a shield. Thus, I have come to the conclusion that hatred’s self righteousness is a fleeting emotion with little to no real benefit on the psych of the individual.

Ironically, those of us who experience hate often do so with some resemblance of silence. Inanimate objects or organizations beyond our reach never gain a sense of our emotions. Individuals who we might hate rarely know the extent of our feelings and even if they do rarely feel anything more than a passing sense of dismay or amusement. Hate is not a weapon against an enemy you behold; it does not have the power to destroy it, him, her or them on its own.

Hate can have a lasting impact on an individual who feels it. It has been liken to a poison that slowly kills the body. Feelings of intense hate (Hate is an intense emotion, anything less is anger or possibly rage.) can cause a being to feel physical sensations. Illness in the stomach, a weakness in your limbs, dizzy or lack of coordination, fuzzy or temporary lost of sight. These sensations can be linked to several physical responses within the body which change how your heart, liver, stomach, spleen and hormones respond. Hate is part of the flight or flight instinct within us, and can be used to defend ourselves from danger. It’s not designed for a prolong response. Hatred can result in damage to your heart, problems with blood pressure, or physical damage to the stomach resulting in conditions such as ulcers.

Tragically, Hate can kill you. In hating someone or something, you are doing damage to your mental and physical state. Next time you feel that sensation sweep you up and bubble to the surface consider your feelings. In an action of compartmentalization, step back from the feeling and examine it. Separate yourself from the hate and break it down into pieces which you can examine. Decide which parts will impact you long term and look for solutions to solve or endure.  The immediate sensations of hurt, fear or frustration discard as temporary side effects of your situation. Start to slow down the poison that’s spreading within your own body and gain a healthy and happier state of mind